The concept of having favorites — as in, adamantly stating that I like this particular thing much more than that — is kind of foreign to me. The hardest questions for me to answer are ones like these:
What are your favorite movies?
What are your favorite foods?
What kind of music do you like?
I do have preferences for certain things over others, of course — but they’re way more broad than they are specific. When it comes to movies, my preferences are genres instead of titles. I like action and dramas. Comedies are good, too, as long as they’re not the overly dumbed-down type. And I don’t watch horror movies unless someone else is in the room with me (I guess I’m a little bit of a wuss).
If you ask me what kind of music I like? Rock and alternative. I listen to pop and R&B, too, along with a little bit of rap and a few country songs. More than anything, though, it’s a particular song that I’ll identify with instead of the person singing it. Just because I like one song by an artist doesn’t mean I’ll go out and buy all their music.
This may seem foreign to those who can watch one movie multiple times, or people who are die-hard fans of a particular band. (My U2-loving Aunt Cathy comes to mind. How many concerts has she been to now? 50?)
I’m not sure why I don’t have overwhelming favorites. If you asked me to write a Top-10 list of movies, bands, or books, I could probably wrack my brain and come up with some that I like — but even then, they wouldn’t necessarily be in order of preference.
When I’m asked these questions, even though I know the person asking is just trying to get an idea of what I like, I always have to stop and search my brain. It kind of sucks, because when you tell someone that you don’t have a favorite movie or a favorite song, sometimes the person looks at you like, “What do you mean? How can you not?” (Especially if they’re a huge movie and/or music fan.)
I guess I need to sit down and figure out some ready answers to these questions, just to have something I can pull from on the spur of the moment.
12 Comments
I know just what you mean. That’s the frustrating part about going out and meeting people; when you try to get to know each other those questions inevitably come up. But depending on my mood of the moment and who I’m with and what’s going on in my life, my tastes can change a huge amount even day to day.
Maybe that just says we’re very complex beings. Hehe.
Oh zan, its not a lack of opinions so much as it is an abundance of opinions. To decide what is your ‘favorite’ would be to uninclude others that you like as well. Why choose a favorite when you can like them all….
~K
Kel: I like the way your mind works!
Girl, you need yourself some lists.
I’ve always wondered why we’re so obsessed with “bests” and ‘favourites”. I don’t have a “favourite food”, a “favourite song”, or a “favourite place to go”. I can list some favourites in all those categories, but nothing is absolute.
I don’t even have a “favourite colour”, really. Many years ago, a friend of mine was very frustrated when she asked me what my favourite colour was, and I said, “It depends.” The best colour for a shirt isn’t the same as the best for a car, a house, or a flower. And then there are shades of colours, and combinations to be considered. It’s not straightforward.
Nowadays, I just say that my favourite colour is purple. That’s close enough.
You should say that you like variety! Thats what I say when asked to describe some of my favorite things (food, movies, etc). There are so many good things out there that it takes something exceptional to cause me to come back to it.
I guess I am just not a very fanatical guy, I like a lot of things but I am not going to get lost in any one topic/subject/obsession.
I don’t like favorites really.. mostly because that diminishes everything else. I mean, I love sushi and steak, but that doesn’t mean I don’t really love other things. Plus, I change my mind a lot.
“This may seem foreign to those who can watch one movie multiple times, or people who are die-hard fans of a particular band.”
I’m a lot like this. I “like” very few bands, writers, whatever, but when I do, I have to own everything they’ve done.
a lot of us like when people have favorites because it’s easy. we have a list, and asking you about yours is a quick way to put little check marks (with your name on them) next to those things on our lists. enough check marks? winner, winner! we’ll be great friends, or coworkers, or lovers, whatever.
but i don’t think having a favorite precludes you from having specific interests in a broad range of things. and the opposite is also true.
the question should be “what do you like?” let you define the parameters of what is key to defining you. and then you can give a really specific answer, or you can give a broader one that’s more of a sentiment. because if the whole point is learning who YOU are, i’m in no position to tell you how to teach me.
Everytime someone asks me these questions I always forget until I jerk awake at 2am with the answer. Guess they’re not that important to me…
I pretty much have “classic” favorites and “at the moment” favorites. I’ll have things I’m currently enjoying and things I like in a broad sense but might not be involved with now. For example, Les Mis is my favorite “classic” musical (as in, I’ve loved it since I was a kid), but recently I’ve grooved on Avenue Q.
I’m also really bad at narrowing things down, so I prefer to talk about categories of stuff I like rather than specifics.
I don’t have favorites either. I’ve always felt a bit silly about that, so I am really glad to read I am not alone