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(This is cross-posted at BlogHer.)

When I think about people who write memoirs, the first word that comes to mind is exposed. Even though you have the option to disclose as little or as much as you want, there’s still a certain amount of exposure involved. In an article for the Huffington Post, author Rebecca Walker (daughter of Alice Walker) asked, Why Write Memoir When Fiction is So Much More Respectable? Apparently, after Rebecca wrote her first memoir several people in her life disowned her.

After USA Today called [my first memoir] “stunningly honest,” people told me how much they loved the book, how it changed their lives, how gorgeous it is and so on. I heard all of that, I really did, but I also heard what they didn’t say. Like, how they would never write a book like mine. They would never describe their first blowjob to the world in thrilling detail, or admit to shoplifting from JC Penney. While they benefit from me doing it and pity the exorbitant price I paid, at the end of the day I don’t think they really respect me for it. And neither do my colleagues and critics.

Since then, people have recommended that she write fiction instead. When she hears this advice, Ms. Walker says that she’s “amazed anyone would think an artist can switch easily from one form to another, from first person to third.”

I completely agree. Other than the stories I wrote when I was young (up to age 10 or so), I’ve never been a fiction writer. And with very few exceptions, most of the books I read are nonfiction. I’m not saying that I read heavy, dry tomes of history and philosophy or anything like that — I prefer to read memoirs.

I like memoirs because they’re real. These stories and situations actually happened to someone. Sometimes these stories read like fiction because it’s hard to believe that someone could climb to the top of a forbidding mountain or survive a year living in disastrous foreign conditions. But that’s exactly why they’re so interesting to me.

I’ve given some thought to writing a memoir. And yes, of course I know what you’re thinking. What do I, at age 29.5, have to say that other people might be interested in reading? What have I done or experienced that I feel I’d like to share? The thing is, since I’ve read a fair amount of memoirs I’ve realized that you don’t necessarily have to write about an exciting or heroic event — it’s primarily about how you tell the story.

The realization that I might have material for a memoir came to me a few months back when I rediscovered a ton of notes that I wrote over the course of a year. Honestly, since I wrote them over such a long period of time, I had no idea that I’d captured so much detailed information.

I made these notes during a time in my life that was filled with quite a bit of drama — too much drama, actually, since I prefer for my life to be fun rather than crazy. And I certainly didn’t write them because I ever had a smidgen of thought that I might want to write a book one day. I guess I just realized that the situation was pretty intense and it made sense to keep some kind of record.

However, although I think I have a story to tell, I haven’t started any kind of formal writing plan. There are a lot of factors holding me back, one of the biggest ones being time. I understand that we make time for the things we really want to do, but there’s still a lot of doubt in my mind. The doubtful voice tells me, “What if you spend all of these multiple-multiple-multiple hours writing something and it turns out to be crap? You would have wasted your time.” And if there’s one thing I hate, it’s the thought that I’ve wasted my time.

The other factor is what Rebecca Walker said in her article: If you write a memoir, you’re inviting scrutiny. And you have to be ready and willing to accept scrutiny from anyone who reads your words.

To answer Rebecca’s original question, I would say that in most cases, a memoir is definitely less respectable than fiction. Why? Because with very few exceptions, memoir authors can’t help but disclose something about themselves that they never thought they would — some weakness, some embarrassment, something they did that they’re not proud of. Even if people think your book is awesome, they’re also likely to think to themselves, “Wow. I never knew that about her before.”

I don’t know what I’m going to do. Maybe I’ll never get around to it. Maybe I’ll wait a few years before I start. Or maybe, one of these days, I’ll just sit down and start writing.

Related Reading:

Miss Move Abroad tells us about Sandy Shaw, who has lived in Costa Rica for over 20 years: “She pared away from her life all but the essential, so that she might, for a year, concentrate on writing the book she knew she was meant to write.”

On Writing Forward, Deborah Prutzman gives advice for writing a memoir with a partner.

At ADDer World, Bryan Hutchinson has 10 Simple Tips on Writing a Memoir.

The Rejectionist helps us out with Memoir Topics That Are Not, In Fact, of Inherent Interest, And Do Require Some Effort On Your Part In Order to Constitute A Successful Book.